by admin | May 19, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
Creating Good Readers and Brushing a Toddler’s Teeth for 05/19/2018
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: I want my kids to be good readers and read as much as possible. What’s the best way to make this happen? – Literary Dad
Dear Dad: Being a good reader and enjoying reading are two totally different things. It is possible to be a proficient reader who understands nuances, subtext and complex vocabulary but not passionate about sitting down with a book. It is also possible to adore reading but perhaps not score high on standardized tests. Focusing all energy on ability instead of satisfaction can suck the joy right out of reading.
Updated: Sat May 19, 2018
Creating Good Readers and Brushing a Toddler’s Teeth for 05/19/2018
by admin | May 18, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
Letting Kids Handle Their Money and a Tattler for 05/18/2018
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: My children often receive holiday cards with money inside in the mail from their grandparents. They usually spend the money on stupid stuff they don’t need. One time my son gave a $50 bill to the American Heart Association, which is noble but I also thought a bit excessive. Should we let the kids spend their money on anything they want (even if it’s a waste of money) or try to show them the value of saving? – Frugal Dad
Dear Frugal: Define a waste of money. My guess is your definition will be vastly different from that of your children. In the eyes of a 7-year-old, a $50 bill is not much different from a $5 bill. Children don’t know what money can buy or why it might be worth it to save a bit.
Updated: Fri May 18, 2018
Letting Kids Handle Their Money and a Tattler for 05/18/2018
by admin | May 18, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
Letting Kids Handle Their Money and a Tattler for 05/18/2018
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: My children often receive holiday cards with money inside in the mail from their grandparents. They usually spend the money on stupid stuff they don’t need. One time my son gave a $50 bill to the American Heart Association, which is noble but I also thought a bit excessive. Should we let the kids spend their money on anything they want (even if it’s a waste of money) or try to show them the value of saving? – Frugal Dad
Dear Frugal: Define a waste of money. My guess is your definition will be vastly different from that of your children. In the eyes of a 7-year-old, a $50 bill is not much different from a $5 bill. Children don’t know what money can buy or why it might be worth it to save a bit.
Updated: Fri May 18, 2018
Letting Kids Handle Their Money and a Tattler for 05/18/2018
by admin | May 18, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
Letting Kids Handle Their Money and a Tattler
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: My children often receive holiday cards with money inside in the mail from their grandparents. They usually spend the money on stupid stuff they don’t need. One time my son gave a $50 bill to the American Heart Association, which is noble but I also thought a bit excessive. Should we let the kids spend their money on anything they want (even if it’s a waste of money) or try to show them the value of saving? — Frugal Dad
Dear Frugal: Define a waste of money. My guess is your definition will be vastly different from that of your children. In the eyes of a 7-year-old, a $50 bill is not much different from a $5 bill. Children don’t know what money can buy or why it might be worth it to save a bit.
My philosophy in general is that young people learn via experience. They don’t learn by their parents protecting them from the consequences of their actions. If your son gives away all his money to charity or spends it on baseball cards or video games, he won’t have any left the next time he wants something. Imagine the two of you are walking the toy aisle in Target and he is begging for a pack of Pokemon cards. You say, “Do you have any money in your bank?” Your son will realize if he had saved a little money for an occasion when he wanted to buy something, he would be heading home with those cards right then. Furthermore, if you resist the urge to just buy him the toy anyway, he might feel disappointed or walk away realizing he didn’t need the cards. Either way he will learn more about managing his money in that moment than he would in 10 lectures from you.
One more thing: Your son clearly has a compassionate heart. Take pride in that.
Dear Family Coach: My daughter is a goody-goody. She is constantly tattling. She snitches on her brother. She tells her friends’ mothers when her friends make a bad choice. And she tattles on the kids at school to the teacher. She is only in fourth grade, so it hasn’t been a huge issue. But I can see her friends are growing tired of her ratting them out. How can I get her to mind her own business for everyone’s sake? — Tattler’s Mom
Dear Tattler’s Mom: No one likes a tattler, not the teacher, not the friend’s parent and clearly not you. You daughter is probably getting lots of social feedback that squealing on friends isn’t a popular choice, and yet she continues. That’s because she has a fundamental issue with dishonesty or going against the rules. Some children are extreme rule followers, and it upsets them greatly when others don’t follow suit. Even though your daughter may lose her friends, she most likely feels it is the price to pay for righting a wrong.
While being right at all costs might make your daughter unpopular, her behavior isn’t all bad. This world needs people like your little tattler to ensure there is equity among the people, and that all are treated fairly. Try to teach your daughter that there are differences in levels of injustice and it is OK to overlook a few minor infractions for the sake of getting along. Work with her to tolerate ambiguity and be more flexible. This will help her deal with the frustration she may feel pushes her to tattle in the first place.
Dr. Catherine Pearlman is the author of “Ignore It! How Selectively Looking the Other Way Can Decrease Behavioral Problems and Increase Parenting Satisfaction.” To write to Dr. Pearlman, send her an email at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Catherine Pearlman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
Letting Kids Handle Their Money and a Tattler
by admin | May 18, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
Letting Kids Handle Their Money and a Tattler for 05/18/2018
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: My children often receive holiday cards with money inside in the mail from their grandparents. They usually spend the money on stupid stuff they don’t need. One time my son gave a $50 bill to the American Heart Association, which is noble but I also thought a bit excessive. Should we let the kids spend their money on anything they want (even if it’s a waste of money) or try to show them the value of saving? – Frugal Dad
Dear Frugal: Define a waste of money. My guess is your definition will be vastly different from that of your children. In the eyes of a 7-year-old, a $50 bill is not much different from a $5 bill. Children don’t know what money can buy or why it might be worth it to save a bit.
Updated: Fri May 18, 2018
Letting Kids Handle Their Money and a Tattler for 05/18/2018
by admin | May 17, 2018 | Blog, Toy Reviews
BattleBots is one of the best family shows on television. After a year hiatus, thankfully Discovery Networks (Discovery and Science Channel) decided to revive the show. BattleBots like a mashup of mixed martial arts and a monster truck battle. Two remote controlled robots are put into a bulletproof cage and let loose on each other until one bot dies. There are fireworks and head on collisions, loose wheels flying, flame throwers and screaming and laughter and … I could go on and on.
We were invited to be guests at live taping of the show in Long Beach, California. I went into the old airplane hanger happy to escort my 11-year-old robotics-obsessed son to the event. I had no illusion that I, too, would have a blast. I was so wrong. It was one of the most entertaining events I’ve been to with or without my kids. Now we are excited to see how the season plays out. Who will battle who? What damage will be inflicted? What crazy antics will we see? We can’t wait.
There is so much I loved about BattleBots. Old people compete against young people. Men versus women. Kids and families against large BattleBot crews. Some have competed for years. Others are newbies in their first battle ever. There was a 15-year-old girl sitting in front of me with a giant pink bow in her hair. She was as enthralled in the action as my son. And what’s cool is that on a basic level BattleBots are just good entertainment. But the show also highlights how physics, engineering and robotics all play a vital role in the design of these massive 250 pound machines.
The Sharkoprion team
The names of the bots are inspiring. Some favorites are Sharkoprion, Huge (with the best tag line: We’re Kind of a Big Deal), Ultimo Destructo, Petunia, Minotaur and Kraken. We were lucky enough to sit next to Peter Lombardo from the Huge team. My son spent three hours picking Peter’s brain about robotics and building. And to his credit, Peter patiently and enthusiastically responded to each and every question. It was like they live in this universe were science is the coolest thing there is, and it was so awesome to witness.
You can catch Battlebots on both the Discovery and Science channels. Season 3 began on May 11 so check it out to see which bot survives until the end. The show airs at 8 pm.
My son Emmett’s review for your kids:
Battlebots is a TV show where groups of people make big robots. They use different blades and weapons to try to make the other robot immobile. They are in this big square ring with hammers and blockers on the sides. You try to drive around and hit the opponents with a weapon. You win if your opponent stops moving and becomes stuck.
Anyone can do it, and you can build what you want. There are so many different things that can happen. It’s fun seeing what different tools each robot has. It’s just a fun environment. It was so cool to see the inside of every robot. In real life they are actually big, not as tiny as I thought.
It’s always unpredictable and crazy seeing each bot that someone works so hard on gets blown up. No one cares. It’s just fun to compete. It was amazing to see how someone can completely destroy the opponent, rip them apart or melt them. It’s just really entertaining.
by admin | May 12, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
An Uncooperative Bar Mitzvah Boy and a Budding Rapper for 05/12/2018
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: My son is scheduled to have his bar mitzvah next year, and it’s a very important event for our family. Unfortunately, he doesn’t see it that way. He never practices; he drags his feet to Hebrew school; and he has said repeatedly that he doesn’t care about Judaism. What can I do to change his attitude? – Kosher Pickle
Dear Kosher: This is a tough one because it involves faith and family and so many things you clearly hold dear. However, you’re pretty limited in what can be done. I’m guessing you’ve explained why his bar mitzvah is an important event. He likely knows the significance of the ritual and the history of the Jewish people. And yet, none of that has swayed him. At this point, you have two choices. You can continue to beg and bribe him until he finally makes it to the event. But you can’t complain if he doesn’t wow the crowd. The other option is to do absolutely nothing.
Updated: Sat May 12, 2018
An Uncooperative Bar Mitzvah Boy and a Budding Rapper for 05/12/2018
by admin | May 12, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
An Uncooperative Bar Mitzvah Boy and a Budding Rapper for 05/12/2018
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: My son is scheduled to have his bar mitzvah next year, and it’s a very important event for our family. Unfortunately, he doesn’t see it that way. He never practices; he drags his feet to Hebrew school; and he has said repeatedly that he doesn’t care about Judaism. What can I do to change his attitude? – Kosher Pickle
Dear Kosher: This is a tough one because it involves faith and family and so many things you clearly hold dear. However, you’re pretty limited in what can be done. I’m guessing you’ve explained why his bar mitzvah is an important event. He likely knows the significance of the ritual and the history of the Jewish people. And yet, none of that has swayed him. At this point, you have two choices. You can continue to beg and bribe him until he finally makes it to the event. But you can’t complain if he doesn’t wow the crowd. The other option is to do absolutely nothing.
Updated: Sat May 12, 2018
An Uncooperative Bar Mitzvah Boy and a Budding Rapper for 05/12/2018
by admin | May 12, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
An Uncooperative Bar Mitzvah Boy and a Budding Rapper
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: My son is scheduled to have his bar mitzvah next year, and it’s a very important event for our family. Unfortunately, he doesn’t see it that way. He never practices; he drags his feet to Hebrew school; and he has said repeatedly that he doesn’t care about Judaism. What can I do to change his attitude? — Kosher Pickle
Dear Kosher: This is a tough one because it involves faith and family and so many things you clearly hold dear. However, you’re pretty limited in what can be done. I’m guessing you’ve explained why his bar mitzvah is an important event. He likely knows the significance of the ritual and the history of the Jewish people. And yet, none of that has swayed him. At this point, you have two choices. You can continue to beg and bribe him until he finally makes it to the event. But you can’t complain if he doesn’t wow the crowd. The other option is to do absolutely nothing.
Bar mitzvahs are supposed to be meaningful, and if they’re not, what’s the point? Why force him to work toward something that means little to him? Why spend all that money and all that time planning an event?
If you back off, your son might decide he is actually more interested. And if he doesn’t, then there’s a possibility he will decide to follow the tradition and have a bar mitzvah as an adult. At that point it would be significantly more meaningful. Force-feeding religion often backfires because it feels more like a punishment than a gift. So give your son time, and exercise patience. I know it’s not ideal, but it may well work out better in the long run.
Dear Family Coach: My daughter is 16, and she’s decided she wants to be a professional rapper. At first I didn’t take this very seriously, but I recently came upon several notebooks of her rhymes. They’re profane and gross, and they make no sense. She has played a few local shows and insists her music will be her ticket to an amazing life. What can I do to stop this? — The Fresh Mom of Despair
Dear Mom: Your daughter is 16. That’s the heart of the age when teens experiment with their voice, their wardrobe, their thinking and their behavior. Sometimes teens have crazy fantasies about their adult life-to-be. It doesn’t mean it will all stick. So for now, let her rap. Let her write awful lyrics; let her curse; let her perform and do shows. She’s expressing herself, and that’s not such a bad thing. Even if you don’t approve of her vehicle of expression, she is probably better off letting it out than keeping it in.
If it’s even remotely possible (aka it wouldn’t embarrass her), try going to see her in action. Even if you think she’s terrible, find something you admire. Be proud of her charisma and confidence to stand before people and express herself. She will likely be overjoyed you showed an interest.
Truth be told, this is a real opportunity for you to deepen your relationship. Talk to her about her music. Ask her about the lyrics and what inspires her. Make clear that as long as her grades stay up and she doesn’t lose focus on academics (keeping her options open), you will support her. Who knows? Maybe the next Nicki Minaj is living under your roof.
Dr. Catherine Pearlman is the author of “Ignore It! How Selectively Looking the Other Way Can Decrease Behavioral Problems and Increase Parenting Satisfaction.” To write to Dr. Pearlman, send her an email at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Catherine Pearlman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
An Uncooperative Bar Mitzvah Boy and a Budding Rapper
by admin | May 12, 2018 | Dear Family Coach
An Uncooperative Bar Mitzvah Boy and a Budding Rapper for 05/12/2018
Dear Family Coach
Dear Family Coach: My son is scheduled to have his bar mitzvah next year, and it’s a very important event for our family. Unfortunately, he doesn’t see it that way. He never practices; he drags his feet to Hebrew school; and he has said repeatedly that he doesn’t care about Judaism. What can I do to change his attitude? – Kosher Pickle
Dear Kosher: This is a tough one because it involves faith and family and so many things you clearly hold dear. However, you’re pretty limited in what can be done. I’m guessing you’ve explained why his bar mitzvah is an important event. He likely knows the significance of the ritual and the history of the Jewish people. And yet, none of that has swayed him. At this point, you have two choices. You can continue to beg and bribe him until he finally makes it to the event. But you can’t complain if he doesn’t wow the crowd. The other option is to do absolutely nothing.
Updated: Sat May 12, 2018
An Uncooperative Bar Mitzvah Boy and a Budding Rapper for 05/12/2018
